End of a chapter

It has now been almost 3 weeks since E stopped nursing. I guess she just decided that she was too big for that :) 

It happened so suddenly too. One day she was nursing like normal 4 times during the day, and the next day, nope she was done. I thought maybe it was a phase, or she wasn't feeling good, and I kept offering for the next week. But every time she would push it away like she does to the spoon when shes full. She takes a bottle just fine though. I had been dealing with some supply issues {whats new right?} and I don't know if that was annoying her, but for whatever reason she decided she was done. 

I have heard from many mommas that the other end of this isn't any easier, the babies who want to keep nursing until they are 15, Heck as much money as we were saving not buying formula, I was about to start bottling it and sending with her to college.. just kidding the weird thing.. and I shouldn't say weird, since I have heard from different mommas that also ended up at this same frequency, but now she will wake up at 4:30is every morning nurse and then go right back to sleep. 

I'm sure half of you are shaking your head at me right now, but don't judge. I wasn't expecting my almost 9 month old {at the time} to just give up on nursing, I had planned to do it until 12 months. I really loved it and our time together, so to just cut it off like that, was sad. {For those of you have have never nursed, you may be thinking I need meds for my emotions, and you know what.. you may be right, I may actually need meds for a few different things, but unless you have nursed you just don't understand, why I am feeling this way, or maybe you do????}So yes I do get up and nurse her, maybe I will look back on this and say "why the heck did I do that" but honestly I don't think I will, she will only be this small for just a short time more, and I enjoy it. 

Now I don't go in and wake her, if she sleeps through it.. so be it, but if she wakes I just nurse her at that one time and shes right back to sleep. For the past three weeks I have been keeping up with pumping on the same schedule she was taking bottles, boy do I hate that pump, I am thinking when this is all over I may have a burning ceremony???

Starting this week I am going to try and figure out how my body will respond to gradually tapering down with the pumping, I would like to still nurse her that one time if I can. I have heard some woman were able to keep their supply at only once per day, and others dried up quickly, so I am curious to see how this all plays out. I am thinking it wont last, especially since I only have ever nursed/pumped one side at a time. 

so that would mean she would nurse from each side every other day, and I'm not thinking I want to be lopsided it will work out.

So while I am a bit sad that this part of our lives is over, I am also kinda excited, that I can drink more then one glass of wine now that I can workout harder, not have to dress in clothes that are nursing acceptable.. totally walked out of the house on Easter Sunday in a white sundress and realized.. if I had to go nurse her I would pretty much have to undress my self.... yea not a good thing .. at church.. and on Easter.. {hmm I say that like in any other situation it would be ok to be naked... LOL}

In case your wondering, I do have a freezer full of breastmilk, I would say enough for 2 months, right now E is getting my pumped milk 2 times a day and 2 formula bottles a day, she does 4 bottles total every day with 4-5.5 oz in each one. She is also on mostly table food, and some baby food.